Monday, July 24, 2006

of all the things I've lost...

...I miss my mind the most. Isn't that how the saying goes? I think so, but I'm one of those people who really does miss their mind. So....

The baby is on track to turn 4 months old at the end of this week. I'm a little sad at how fast these four months have passed. But my cognative functions are starting to return. Not to any grand state of intellectuality, mind you. But the fog of the mind is starting to lift a little bit. Yeah!

Every mom knows that
being a mom does something to your ability to think, but pregnancy, especially the later stages, really does a number on my brain function. The body goes first, of course, but I don't mind that too much. The ability to tie my own shoes isn't a big deal as I usually wear sandals when I can get away with it. I solve the whole "picking things up off the floor" problem by just crawling around in sorry fashion and depositing toys and clothes in their place or near their place. I haven't learned to compensate for the mind on hiatus. Just ask Ben. He looks at me blankly as I try to finish my sentence because I can't locate the word to describe, you know, that um, thing we use to, uh...you know.

The brain-loss started early this time because we moved across the country in my first trimester and the physical and emotional exaustion took an early toll. Before the move I was reading some great books.
The Elegant Universe by Brian Greene and The Story of Art by E.H. Gombrich and I was starting a biography on Henry James. I was enjoying them. I could actually half-wrap my mind around some of those crazy ideas physicists come up with. But once we changed time zones and my belly grew a little more round, I just couldn't even pick those books up. I didn't give up reading altogether. I read my comfort books. I was in a new place and needed the familiar. But no new books, no new insights.

Things are changing, though. I picked up
The Elegant Universe today and looked at it. I opened it up and read the caption under a small illustration of something about the unifying of the String Theory, called the M-Theory or something like that. I think my mind is coming back. I'll let you know for sure in a few months. And if you feel up to it, you can come to the gathering of physicists that I'll be hosting. Bring your string.

1 comment:

  1. Allysha, I love your blog. If I had the time and mental capacity I would respond to all of them. As it is, I can only say AMEN to this one. Why is it that mothers must sacrifice their minds as well as their bodies? And it only gets worse (with a capital WORSE) when you start knocking on that great door of hormonal change supposedly designed to set you free.

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