Have various children wake in the wee hours of the morning. Invite them (or not, but they will invite themselves anyway) into your bed while you pretend to sleep. Carry children out to their own beds. Pretend to not listen to them cry in their beds.
When things calm down and you think you might be able to sqeeze in 30 more minutes of sleep have a child come back into your room because they are sick and have vomited all over their bed.
Comfort child. Go to get some bathwater running. Realize that you have no hot water. Email your landlord in CA to let them know. Check water heater. Find that you have plenty of hot water in said heater. When you go to check the temperature, discover that it has been hovering under 10 degrees all night long. Surmise that you have a frozen pipe somewhere. Email landlord again with updated information.
In the meantime, heat water up on stove so that you can fill the bathtub with warm water so that your sick child can finally bathe. Make sure that all of your other children are grumpy and clingy and have a penchant for playing Yahtzee that will not be satisfied unless they are read to by their father, who has to finish grading papers.
Be thankful you took a bath last night. Be sorry you didn't bother to wash your hair. Look at the clock on your wall. 9:33 a.m. Happy New Year.