Monday, February 12, 2007

a love note to my daughters

How funny it is to watch you grow up, completely parallel to my own growth as a mother. I am a mom because here you are, my girls, whirling before me, half myself, half your dad, and all your own. I have scarcely contemplated the perils of parenting but you remind me of them almost daily, as you should. It is not something I want to take lightly.

And yet, I don't want our relationship to be so overburdened with too many cares that I forget to laugh and sing with you. That I can't enjoy your company for fear of making some tremendous mistake. I have made many mistakes. And I will surely make more. I hope that I can teach you that there is a grace in overcoming, because none of us is perfect.

The mother-daughter relationship is a complicated one, filled with the potential for companionship and rivalry. I was a girl as you two are now, and you will become, each, your own woman, as I am striving to be. There are moments when my past collides with your future and I am left trembling at the fact that I can't protect you from everything I would like to. I can only hope to teach and prepare you as best I can. But I confess to standing still as I see you, who I am not, personalities that never belonged to me, and wonder how to help you. And I see you as I am, my own weaknesses and faults flailing before me, and am not in any better place to know how to fix things.

If there is one gift I hope to give you, it is a sure knowledge of who you are. That you are divine. That who you are is of extraordinary importance. That you are enough.

The world is full of detractors who will try to make you feel less than. I hope you will have learned from me that what they say is false. Beauty is made and found within and you two are beautiful. Capacity is made and found with in, and you two are capable. Thank you for being my girls, for wanting to be near me, for wanting to be like me. I love you.


  1. Very touching post. I hope to teach my kids, too, that they are good enough and that they are divine individuals no matter what any body else might think of them!

  2. How lovely, and a very beautiful letter. I'm moved by it.