Tuesday, March 13, 2007

anywhere the wind blows

Ah. But who's in charge of the wind?

These past few days Ben has embarked on a little journey, the results of which will significantly alter our future. He has gone to Utah for a job interview, and I am here with the kids, and we both are left at night, alone, wondering, as to how this thing is going to play out.

I am open to either outcome. Stay. Go. There are pros and cons to both. Well, yeah. I have to be open to either outcome, since I don't make the final decision. Obviously you don't apply to a job if you aren't interested in it. And there are a lot of things about this one that I would be interested in. But it's not like we're entertaining any 'end of the world' scenarios here.

Of course, it's not actually my job. But it's kind of like marriage; you marry the guy, you marry the family; you get the job, the family gets the job. Maybe that's why they say that the best things come in small packages--there are less ramifications. But that leaves me wondering, if you really look at life, how many things actually come in a small package? Very few.

We won't know for awhile what the outcome will be. And it's been a process anyway, so I am trying to continue in that philosphical vein to which I have become so attached, with the added caveat that I just shouldn't think about it too much, and life will go on it's merry way and be easier.

The truth of the matter is this: you do what you can do, and you leave the rest to God. And that's the comforting thought, because He can see much farther than Ben or I ever could. And in things like this, I've found that the best place to be is in the palm of His hand, taking care of the little things and letting Him take care of the bigger ones.


  1. Next year we will be blowing anywhere the wind blows. It is kind of a scary thought because for the entire 8 years we have been married, my husband has been in school.

    Let us know what happens. I am so grateful that these things are ultimately in God's hands.

  2. This is a beautifully phrased bit of philosophy. I hope God's hand leads you to Utah because I'm selfish and would love to meet you.

  3. Yes, in His palm is the ebdst place for you right now. I wish you luck in this process!

  4. Oh, I would love to see him there. I'm crossing my fingers that everyone there is not a moron and he sailed through the process.